My Profile

Since becoming a SAHD, I find myself joining a lot of different online parenting resource sites – groups, blogs, diapers.com, etc… The one thing they all have in common? Filling out a profile. I find myself skipping this step except for the “required field marked with an asterisk.” The reason is not because I’m lazy…but I believe setting up online profile is like writing your own eulogy – you share all the signature details that made you who you are in life that usually only your family or close friends would laugh, cry or be upset at. And it’s only as good until my membership (or life) expires. But how can I answer all these questions as if today was the first time I've ever been asked? My life has changed drastically in the past 10 years alone. Well, let's start there.

I picked the most popular questions from each site I've joined over the last three months. I'm going to answer each as I would have during three important stages in my life over the past ten years. First, as if it was 1999, the year before I met the love of my life – my wife. Second, as if it was 2005, the year my wife and I were married. And lastly, present day. Exactly how I am today - a SAHD to a one year old girl and another baby on the way in 2010.

The point of this experiment is not to come off all “dudish” or immature. It’s not meant to appear as if I long for those days of high school or college (like the producers of Gossip Girl). If anything, at the very least, it proved how my humor has gone from early Eddie Murphy or Andrew Dice Clay to Ray Romano or Tim Allen today. Sad? You be the judge.

1999 - before meeting my wife

Login info
Email address: kegman69@somemail.com
Username: sexyouupplaya
Photo: insert picture of me doing a keg stand with or possibly without pants on here

Personal info
Sex: All the time baby cause I'm living la vida loca.
City: Toronto
State/Province: Ontario
Country: Canada eh!

Work info
Industry: Full time student. Part time lover
Occupation: TBD but currently Frosh Master

Additional Info
Interests: Surfing the interwebs. Googling myself (hehe). Keggers. Working out.

About me
Y2K doesn't scare me. I already withdrew all my money and am keeping it in my POG collector can until 2001. I enjoy weekends at the cottage with my boys - fishin n’ drinkin. I’m gonna party like its 1999 and that is my final answer cause I’m a playa.

Favorite Movie: Fight Club, Scarface, Goodfellas

Favorite Books: Do magazines count? If so Maxim, Stuff, Men’s Health

Favorite Food: Pizza, Big Macs or whatever is open at 3am on Friday or Saturday nights.

Five things I can't live without: Beer, Maple Leaf Hockey, Mambo # 5 Cd in my Saturn Coupe, women and a six pack....of beer. Burn!!!

2005 - the year my wife and I got married

Login info
Email address: joshuajweiner@hotmail.com
Username: joshuajweiner
Photo: insert wedding picture here

Personal info
Sex: Male
City. Toronto
State/Province: Ontario
Country: Canada.

Work info
Industry: Consumer Packaged Goods
Occupation: Key Account Manager for Pepsi Canada

Additional Info
Interests: Furniture shopping. American Idol (go Taylor Hicks). Sports. Condo shopping. Relaxing at home with my lady watching trashy TV.

About me
I’m a closet Maroon 5 fan. I do not know what a Hollaback Girl is. I’m pretty sure Brad and Angelina are dating and am very happy Letterman and Oprah finally made up. I spend most of my weekends chilling around the apartment or at Bed Bath and Beyond with my fiancé.

Favorite Movie: Crash, Brokeback Mountain, March of the Penguins

Favorite Books: Do books made into movies count? If so, then Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Memoirs of a Geisha and Batman Begins (comic books count).

Favorite Food: Whatever my wife prepares because she is an amazing cook. If she’s not home then cereal.

Five things I can't live without: my wife, Alexander Keith’s Beer, Maple Leaf Hockey, my RAV 4, a cell phone and a finger in my Wendy’s chili. Burn!!!

Present Day

Login info
Email address: joshua.j.bennett@hotmail.com
Username: joshuajbennett
Photo: insert picture of me, my wife and my little girl Ava here.

Personal info
Sex: On my Birthday
City. Brooklyn
State/Province: NY
Country: USA.

Work info
Industry: Parenting
Occupation: Stay at home dad

Additional Info
Interests: Playing with Ava all day. Preparing myself for the next thing that is potentially harmful for my kids (toys, food, H1N1, accessories, etc.). Silently judging parents who put pacifiers back in their child’s mouth after it fell on the subway floor.

About me
I am a diaper changing master. I can push a stroller, pull a grocery cart, talk on a cell phone and kick a nerf ball all at once. I’m learning exciting new things to cook like roasted vegetables and pasta.

Favorite Movie: I haven't seen one since Borat. "Very nice!" Do people still say that, because Ava LOVES it.

Favorite Books: Goodnight Moon, Ten Little Fingers and Ten Little Toes, But Not the Hippopotamus

Favorite Food: whatever Ava doesn’t finish that I can shove in my mouth before she starts screaming. So usually, yogurt, peas, and plums.

Five things I can't live without: my wife, my kid, a diaper bag, a stroller and peace of mind. Snap!!!